Enemy.

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Due to vulnerability everything is double or nothing.

You have to be careful child.The predators can smell it emanating from your pores and they will come on cloven hooves bearing empty gifts.You will be blinded by the shine,the presentation.Deny them.

Consider yourself warned and arm yourself accordingly.

This is where you have shored up and it is imperative to have the right weapons.The correct protection.A filter.A deep trench filled with feces smeared bamboo spears,upright and waiting.A Kevlar coating.

Pretend that they are speaking in a different language because for all practical purposes of self preservation they are.Sidekicks,almost ran’s who smell distress who want to kiss your ever festering ill disguised wounds with a hot open mouth.The sheen of  your tears brings tumescence and carnal glee.Your vulnerability is their call to arms.They are the cock-lead jackasses that roam your arid plains out for blood.

Your blood,the finest vintage, specifically.

Carnal carrion.They circle endless.

You may as well have a target tattooed on your dermis.This is real and it is lethal.This is what it is and we have no time to talk of a cure.We must speak of strategy and defense.

Human contact will do it,compliments even more so.Interest must be deflected at all costs and trust will never again be an option.Kindness kills. Your need will have a bodycount of one.

You.

The hollow halls inside of you thrum with grief and eye watering petrol fumes.These monsters that come creeping are lit matches and your fuse is so alluring.You will go up like the Overlook hotel so keep them at bay with that colossal intellect and speed racer mouth .Mae West of the boondocks.

Blind them with science and run.

Nothing is worth it as you have by now found out.It would never mean what you wanted it too,not really.You would be too caught up watching yourself watch yourself,watch your self baby because the wolf will not leave your door,he will lean on the bell and drive you mad. And in a damaged way that perversely pleases you.Smarten up and pay attention. Divorce your head from the clouds.Its a miasma that sprays from your soul and lets the monsters know that you are in residence in the Summer palace of heartbreak. The flag need not be raised because they know,they know…..

They watch your every move,shadow your dreams and poison your food.Your life must be lead unassisted by human contact.It is a fatal frailty.

And yet perversely you engage yourself,your shell harder now than ever.In part to prove that you can,to register a victory for the self in light of the failure of a lifetime.But you are terrified of contact yet, like a siren ,you sit on the ragged rocks and sing so sweetly only to have them come and lay tribute at your twitching tail.You want to reject them as you yourself have been rejected.It is petty and predictable. A waste of time spent on other things,on reinforcements.

Ever the human,so fucking fallible.Gives you a  little rush don’t it baby,a little tingle huh? A feminine power trip and you are drunk on it.Tipsy on titillating,teasing the animals ,holding yourself  just out of reach.Active and progressing in the art of artifice recreating your every atom,rejecting age and origin you endlessly tweak and tune the machine and sell it on to the masses.

You flame your own pyre.You die everyday only to rise like the carpenters son once the light hits the mirror and you paint yourself back into existence once again.

Never thought it would feel so good didja? That you cold ,be so very cruel…and you are the reaction to the abysmal actions that were taken against you in the sacred bond of trust.In love.And now your heart is ice and beauty is your god.Your wounds define your actions both taken and thought and this is how it is. So best you make firm friends with it.Your twin,your anemia.She has the right idea ,listen to her,she is smarter than you but there is always room and time to learn ,so forsake your ego and do so.Take her lessons and apply them.She is practical alchemy.Her soul a waste land.There are worse things to aspire to my broken one.

They want to take.To plunder.That is why they are nice.Why they take an interest in you.Flowers and compliments.Dinner invitations and phone numbers.Lies.All lies.They want to violate you with their bodies.Twist you to their desires.To fuck you and then fuck you.And you will do nothing but pay.It will cost you and although the safe is locked it protects air,it is bereft of bounty.But they are not to know that.They see treasures ,a priceless jewel to hang from their ego.They will debase you,undermine you when the lights go down.Break you like a wild horse and hang you out to dry because of their own insecurities.It will all be your fault once again.

You know this is the truth.It always has been.

To all ? You say no.

You refuse as is now your right and your duty.If you do not?

You will die.

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