88 in the shade…

You nearly had me roped and tied.

-Elton John.

Dream on white girl and wake up to a brand new day.

-INXS.

Up all night is a really good color on you! I like it alot…..

Red zero seven.

Hotter than a snakes ass in a wagon rut in here tonight.

Pant,Pant,panting like the no breed mutt that I am.

Cleavage and ass sweat abound. If I still drank it would be Jack Daniels on crushed ice in a tall glass with mint and a dash of brown sugar. Imbibed in front of a slow moving fan, good for nothing but pushing the heat around on my porch. I would sip all day humming to myself, get up to find something to eat round dusk,trip over my coon hound and probably fall down the stairs.

That kind of hot. Hard drinking hot.

In lieu of that?

I will eat pecans and listen to Cannibal corpse .You make do with what you’ve got. I babysat last night and kicked complete ass at it. I have never really had all that much to do with kids but Jake (aka ;”The beloved demon spawn”) is 35 pounds of a good time in my well thumbed book. I am good with him cause I can give him back and  doing a kick ass monkey impersonation including the picking and eating of imaginary lice don’t hurt neither.Gold.

He said that I am his favorite girl and wants to kiss me all the time. He is such a dude. Climbs me when I am in downward dog position while doing yoga and sticks things down my top and finds it hysterical.

He is one of the better dates I have had believe me.

“What are ya Jake? ” I say tickling him while we lie curled up on the floor watching CSI Las Vegas

“A Heart-breaker” he yawns

“That’s right!” I smile and blow a raspberry on his arm.

See, the shit I teach kids.Lisle is worse though.Thanks to her when ever he drops a fart he laughs and says “That’s a duck in my butt!” I just teach him to talk in Zeplin-ese. Trust me .The arty girls will love it by the time he reaches high school.I am doin the kid a solid!

I keep going out onto the still suburban lawn,scratchy under my bare feet and stare gormlessly up into the full moon. Wishing that I was on the ocean, my slice of it ,back home. Ah! my shack…2 months ago I was standing on the hill top at the end of my street looking out over a sea of mercury forever. Every detail clean. I walked the spooky silver sands till dawn and went home and passed out on the deck.

If you had of told me how much shit could change? Oh brother! Not only change but how much I could go with it to boot in 8 short weeks I don’t think that I would have or could have for that matter, believed you…..Saturday night and you know that I ain’t gonna sleep. My mind is running the New York minute.

Gene made it safe into Melbourne and I know that Francis will be there with open arms…Francis, the friend that I thought that I had lost. He was the one who believed in me the most and then left. Why? Fuck, who can really say but for some reason I picked up my phone before I left Australia strung out on post Maiden good vibes and I dialed his long-ago number. And there we were.Me blathering on and him chuckling like always. We have alot to rebuild but there it is.If I have it my way ( And I usually do ) I will be on the road with him and High on fire sometime towards the end of the year.

He was the only one from my napalmed past that I ever wanted to find again. Everyone else I still have fantasies of pushing down a flight of stairs….after setting them alight….

Oh! If it was not so hot in my room I would have my hand down my pants over the news that my ( “Yours???” internal voice) Yes! Fuck off! “My” adored Bloodduster are going to be playing at the Knitting Factory in Hollywood on the 29th of may.Yessssss!!!! Wish that Gene was not gonna be on the road but I am gonna throw Michelle in head first. Love moi? Love the Duster.Its gonna be so fuckin rad! And it will also tide me over with as I don’t really see myself heading home for a while. I really have to get it right out here.

( “How many times do we have to tell you? The city shack will be here waiting for you! You have a home to come back to! Just fuck off and DO this thing…ect,ect..” The Metz-o-rexic and Lili Whitetiger.)

And for the 1st time in I cant tell y’all how fuckin’ long I am having fun playing music. And I ain’t gonna give that up without a fight…..

The songs are sounding great and the label interest has my head fair spinning.Oh, and its not as if I can just drop in for a jam on the weekend is it? Hmmmmm? The Shack to LA? bit of a trek…..

Deluxe writes me from Berlin.He has got a house there and is working on a film. He also informs me that he is dreaming a la kraut. What a fuckin’ adventure! I miss him though. I grew up at his side. Look to my left on stage and there he was holding it down and pushing it forward. I must have been a real fucking handful for him. But he never let me down and I got to rape and pillage the high seas of rock with my best mate at my side. I wonder what the next chapter will be for us? When will I see you again Rossco? Great ,now I have that song by the 3 degrees in my head.Gah.

Got asked the other night how it felt to be a *ahem* cult hero. What cult? Do I make any money out of this aforementioned cult? Is there free love? Robes???Whatever man. I am not. I am too much of a threat to be sugar coated like that. Its a heap of shit. Cult? I have just worked out the instructions on the control panel for my life.!.I don’t even own an I-pod! How the fuck does anyone think I could run a cult let alone…Ok, Enough on that …the heat has me addled.I am gonna go raid the freezer for the last of the soy ice cream in a second…

Also got asked about the book. Ah! Like every other dickhead writer I have finished my 1st book. Which is kinda like what you read up here and not. More of the shit that I have kept hidden.More blood and fucking you know? Soooo…when to publish? And how….Its gonna be DIY because of tight funds and my stellar lack of trust issues. We are all working on making the site a real hub so if and when I release the beast ( In the east? ) This is where you will find it. I will also be selling it at shows.

The K-roc weenie roast was at the Verizon amphitheater down the road from my house today. If you stand on the drive way and the wind is right ,a whisper of echo laden rock caresses you.Always gives me a shiver. Seeing Ted Nugent there is gonna give me alot more than a fucking shiver I will tell ya that for nix. “Stranglehold.” One of the best songs ever. Play it at my wake! Revel in the majesty that is the ‘Nuge while my body cools……

Have talked to a few mates since I have been back but I still have not made it back to Hollywood. ( Writing an album here people! ) Wrote to S1n and shot the breeze and spoke to Misha Bliss on the phone….Ah yes. My sister. My long blond perma-stoned sister to whom I have not spoken to since 05’. I hear that she is well, still anorexic and dating one of Guns and Roses. I wish her well in a strange distant way. She did what she said that she would do as did I. The lack will always be there. But……I don’t go back. ( I will only letcha break my heart once motherfuckers. You only get one pure vestal virgin shot….)

Just ask the Greek chorus of my ghosts. No trust? Then your shit out of luck.

Watched “End of the century” again last night.

Memories…..

When Miss Karen and I lived in a closet on Crown street in Sydney not all that many moons ago with her cat Clunky and a million roaches we would wake up on her dread covered bed ( Hers perfect white blond ,mine a brunette follicular feral abortion ) and half asleep ,attemping to kick start another day in hell ,we would watch that followed by ” God,Its Iggy” I would sip tea while she mainlined coffee with nothing but our wits and far flung dreams keep us alive.

(“And that Charlie brown is the meaning of Christmas”)

Me and my Phd in memories and missing people huh? Saint Tina is home again sans camel. Blackie is writing songs as effortlessly as other people draw breath,Miss Raquel my errant wife is MIA in Melbourne and  I worry.R is on the road with Kiss keeping all and sundry together,Diamond Lil finally wrote me …to tell me that she will write me soon,soon,soon,mama and they all look down on my sleepy head.Photos of them all before I turn out the light.On every continent and  creased paper for always…”You were always a star to me” I sigh as I look into their paper eyes and dream.

(….And are you out there? Are you thinking of me as I do you? Its about you.It always has been…)

I am gonna drive myself back to drink if I don’t get a handle on it. The heat and the moon are conspiring to make me lose my grip and swoon under maybes and ain’t never gonna haves. I will leave and dream of my red lights….

M

7

x